mute monday: summer

the trout movie trailer

Mute Monday: competition

don't hate me. i cannot be mute this time.
added monday mid day due to confusion: how does this relate to the theme of competition? this is the competition for the worst shyt you could possibly wear. see labels when in doubt.

by now, everyone is aware of my neurotic concern with how one dresses to travel. here we have airport fashion as demonstrated by, what else, a TV and movie star. i get you want to be comfortable. but do you have no sense of obligation to your fellow travelers? this is one of those times i hate flip flops most. or perhaps this actress is getting a jump start on dressing for El-Obama's Amerika. i can't wait to see the "juicy couture" burka. can you? and what is with the head scarf? it makes sense....when you are AUNT JEMIMA!


speaking of burkas, i can think of at least one place it really makes sense. when i join al qaeda, im coming on board with one of those "star maps" they sell to idiot tourists in L.A. Barbara is a fierce competitor for bad fashion; category? age appropriateness. how old is this hag now? 87? maybe we can recycle some of NYC's broke down cranes to jack up these granny tits. please!


what does one say to the rash of ass-writing on clothing? i can sort of give 13-16 year olds, possibly even college aged women a pass. but i see lots and lots of middle aged crazy out there sportin' this shyt. "juicy land?" AYFKM? disgusting. actually, i challenge this woman on her claims of "juicy". like hell.

Dear God. where to start? ugly. fugly! these feet cant even stay on the slick ass shoe properly. this just looks cheap and bad. having this pink nail polish is like putting lipstick on a pig. this is one of the reasons i am always fantasizing about moving to iceland. other than i think it might be a good idea to hole up with some vikings. grrrherherhaha

oh shyt, no, wait! somebody already figured out the WINTER flip flop angle. ive seen this -not these furry flip-flops, but college types wearing flip-flops in full blown icey cold winter. now there is no safe season from this visual blight.

wuss up, Frodo? you know, the mandal thing has gotten me in a lil bit of hot water with some people. i made a little dig about it on someone i really really like - and i only spoke up because i want him to succeed in his, er, quest. Look, men in sandals is ghey. it is. im sorry. but it is. at the beach only. ive said this already but it bears repeating: i only want to see a mans feet if the entire rest of him is nekkid. who's with me?

young men seem to be the greatest offenders of flip-flop wearing. i dont like these new y generation men. i dont. they are way too casual and dirty looking. im glad im old. seriously. men in my age group wear suits, or a nice shirt and some nice jeans or pants with proper footwear. then they come home have a martini or two or three -take the clothes off and get in bed. nekkid. repeat the next day. and the next. and the next. one of the reasons i like old school bluesmen is the way they dress. you aint NEVER gonna see a bluesman in flip flops. ever. or crocs.

first there was crocs. and then there was shyt to stick in the crocs. i hate these things. i hate plastic shoes. they are hideous. and when i see someone wearing crocs? i assume they are an idiot; because they look like one. ive been writing on this blog for years about the decline of western civilization; and if my warnings about islam or obama or rampant illegal immigration doesnt get your attention surely CROCS will penetrate those blinders you are wearing.

Oh No. no. no. no. no. no. now a croc cell phone case?

in fact, crockery is so hated that there is now an entire cottage industry on hating them. i love capitalism!

i see this more often than you can imagine. i believe that shoes should contain the entire foot. am i wrong? i wouldnt leave the house like this. i think this is a movie star. and i think they have a ton of dough. and i think this could be avoided.

kumbaya you dumb mofo. eat a few sticks and twigs for me.

grrherherhahahahahaha!!! i bet these cost a lot too.

this was from a webpage that asked would you rather wear a theme sweater or die. personally, id rather wear a theme sweater than die. but after death? no way. this is something i saw quite a bit as a teacher. i bet foamy will back me up on this. when i was teaching i would hear the lament about how hard it was to meet a man. and the common excuse was schools are 95% women's world. but i submit to you that its very hard to snare a man when you are dressed up like a rose bowl parade float. you want to celebrate the holidays with your students. i understand. that is what BULLETIN BOARDS are for.

here is my favorite pony faced hag. (my apologies to all horses) this woman is constantly referred to as a fashion icon. i could have done an entire page on her. Im just stunned. this woman is marketed to us as fabulous in the same way obama is. do not succumb to these propaganda campaigns. the media is NOT your friend. stay vigilant people!

im finally speechless.

and now a note from this blogger: who am i to judge? i am fucken SHE, that's who. ive written already about "judgement" and i will reprint it here again:
"......speaking of judgement...it's become a negative: "don't be judgemental" are you kidding me? i can, do and will make judgements as i see fit. and you are still, as of this posting, free to judge me back and i celebrate that......" it's still a free country. for a little while longer at least.

happy NOT MUTE monday

poseurs, hags, obama, a poll and my new phone

my friends have been going to see the "sex in the city" movie. some of you may recall my long-time ban on hollywood which i broke only once in 3 years to see "no country for old men". Im sure not going to fall off the wagon for this dipshit-fest. in real life? mr. big wouldnt look twice at this chain-smoking pony-faced hag. i developed my stiff hate-on for SJP when i heard her testify before congress about how her broke ass family was struggling in mean old america. anybody see a problem with this *lack of* reasoning? you can read about it in my magnus opus of hater rappery: i love the smell of napalm in hollywood

the sex in the city gals are the poster hags for the kind of vapid-self-absorbed-too exposed-horndog women who blame men for not getting their wonderfulness, and refusing to marry them and buy their manolos. their big problems are what to wear, what others are wearing, who to sleep with, and when can i have another xanax? i read SJP had a shyt attack because the dress she wore to the film's opening had already been photographed and printed in vogue. the designer lied to her!! america DOES suck!

speaking of sucking, complaining hags; another hollywood movie star has threatened to move if John McCain wins the presidency.



they said the same thing about W's second term; they didnt leave. others promised to leave as well: barbara striesand (another hag), janine garofalo, sean penn, danny glover and kevin spacey; but they never did. always talkin'; never walkin'. these culture warriors are about as authentic as terrifying radicals bill ayers and bernadine dohrn. everybody makes a big deal out of the fact that these are some of Obamas friends. but in the end they were your basic garden variety 'enfant terribles; part of a gang of rich kids who became fashion communists (sometimes blowing themselves up making bombs in Daddy's NYC building) later joined the boojzwah society they condemned. so much for the revolution.

it's kind of like how jeremiah "blame whitey" wright moved himself and his old-fart-compensation-porsche into a lillywhiteland mansion. come tho think of it; all the Atlanta rappers live in upscale lillywhiteland too. why don't they move back to the hood and be real ? why doesn't oil rich Saudi Arabia, Iran and Syria help out their palestinian comrades with some cash flow and education instead of weapons and hate? why did magazine-cover do-gooders U2 move their businesses to evade irish taxation? why is nancy pelosi so cheap spending her own money on charity while confiscating ours to redistribute? grrrrrrherherhahahaha



why does everybody think Michelle Obama hates white people? She obviously has an affinity for the whitest haircut ever known to mankind - the "flip" as worn by marlo thomas in "that girl" and "gidget" and then there's.... bring! bring! beaver cleaver's mother called. she wants her 60's homemaker dress and pearls back. i would be more excited if our next first lady was more like american badass angela davis; better marxist style IMHO. more honest too.

speaking of obama... i have a bet with mr. she that obama will NOT pick hillary for VP. $100. who will win? if obama somehow gets pressured into this choice i will actually feel sorry for him. he'll have beet-faced Bill hanging around hoggin' the camera and stirring the pot. and possibly scamming on his little girls. i don't think obama will pick hillary though - i don't think he needs her to win. how is it that obama can hang around with people for years and never get hip to their character? jeremiah wright, father pfleger *may he blow satan's 10,00 flaming dicks in hell*, meeks, rezko, and all the good people at ACORN? besides being a poor judge of character he flips more than john kerry flopped. he could not disown rev wright! oh yes he could, when politically expedient. he said " I don’t have to show my patriotism to be patriotic. A pin on my lapel is not important.” yeah, not unless you need votes in west virgina. then it was finally leaving the church of shame after 20 years -not because he disagreed with the racist anti-american rants - but because it was hurting the campaign. and its never fair to point out these associations because they arent relevant; yet he never misses a chance to make McCain synonymous with Bush. anytime the clintons tried to point out anything about him he whined about it and complained to his minions in the media. like dennis miller said: "i don't care about the color of his skin; i do care about the thinness of it." boo-ya and amen. Obama will do and say anything to be president. he has the thinnest, lamest resume of anyone running for president in 50 years or more. pitiful. everyone should read this page for a very thorough list of why Barak Hussien Obama is unfit for the presidency.

when obama wins the presidency you will:
	self-medicate with reefer and painkillers
	move to the czech republic - i hear prague is great!
	relax! at last, your white guilt assuaged!
	never ever ever learn english. viva la raza!
	transfer all assets out of the U.S. of KKA
	redecorate the survival pit and stock with grey goose
	buy rosetta stone language programs in arabic, farsi and spanish
	praise allah!!
	suck it up
pollcode.com free polls

i got a new cell phone which has a texting keyboard. i would love an iphone but its too expensive so i took the best phone i was eligible for with my plan; which is me mooching off mr she's company. i decided i didnt need a blackberry or something like that - if i have phone internet i will be lost forever and eventually rendered incapable if interacting in a real live social setting. grrrherhahaha. but i love the texting because i was painstakingly punching out messages by sorting through keys that represented several letters...and if i made a mistake it was really hard to fix it. with texting, i can get credit for caring and communicating without actually talking to anyone. (to any readers i may have texted; i dont mean ya'll grrrrherherherherhahaha)

for a little while last week i considered getting a motorcycle or scooter or something to save on gas and global warming and all. then i went over to Emory to plan for my "ancient world art camp" and heard about a girl in the department who recently lost a leg in a scooter accident. now im all like: let the polar bears paddle! grrrerhahaha *jus' kiddin'*

last night on Top Chef the hideous Lisa managed to stay alive when she has been in the bottom two chefs 7 times. every time i see her standing at judge's table, arms crossed in nightclub bouncer stance, with her big-ass double chin and dead eyed petulant stare; i want to take padmas ninja dance knife from her and chop off that piercing on Lisa's eyebrow.

shes the haggiest hag of all the haggards. and she's young. die lisa. DIE.

then last night she was all bummed that richard and stephanie didnt congratulate her "bronze" showing. girl, please! nobody celebrates when evil triumphs! (except the DNC) so DIE LISA DIE. the show last night was not interesting or fun. just terrible. i fell asleep at the 10 PM showing, woke up tried to watch again at 11 and fell asleep again. it must have sucked. and ive been having trouble sleeping! i shouldve TiVoed that sukka for some killer digital soma.

and finally, you might think its hypocritical of me, a sculpture firmly within the category of "middle aged", to be ragging on tv and movie hags for dressing too young and thinking they look cute. but it's not true. ive already adopted an appropriate uniform to shield fellow amerikan comrades *grrrherherhaha* from my sagging skin, crepey decolletage, bald spots, age spots and chunky chicos jewelry:



grrrherhahaha. * ruela and troll: i will do the MEMES next *

Mute Monday: beauty